Key takeaways
- You don’t have to tell your employer that someone you love has cancer, but it can be beneficial to let them know so they can support you
- Depending on your employment status and your relationship with your loved one, you may be entitled to paid or unpaid leave
- There are a variety of charities and organisations that can provide you and your family information and advice on your rights and any support you can access
When you find out that someone you care about has cancer you may have concerns about work and finances. Depending on the circumstances, your loved one may not be able to continue working during treatment and they may not have the energy to do the things they normally would. If you need to provide them with physical and emotional support, you might be wondering how you are going to juggle work, a social life and home responsibilities on top. One thing that might help is being honest with your employer about the situation. In this guide we share how you can approach the subject.
Who at work to tell about your loved one’s diagnosis
Who you decide to tell at work about your loved one’s diagnosis will likely depend on your role, your company’s structure, and your relationship with colleagues and management. The first thing to do is contact an appropriate person. This could be your line manager or someone in HR.
You don’t have to tell any of your colleagues about your life outside work. But, you may find that they can offer you emotional and practical support if you do speak to them about what your family is going through.
How to tell your manager
Before telling your boss that a family member has cancer, it can be helpful to first make a list of the things you want to say and anything you might be seeking from them. Here are some things you might want to include in your discussions:
- Who at work you have decided to tell about your situation and what you want to tell them
- Whether you will tell other colleagues or if you would like someone else to tell them
- Any changes to your role, responsibilities or working hours that might help you continue working
- Information about your employer’s policies on sick pay, absence from work, occupational health, pensions and any other policies that may be helpful
- Any support for people in stressful situations – for example, an employee assistance programme (EAP) that offers counselling
It may be that you would like them to consider flexible working hours so you can attend appointments with the person you are caring for, or that you’d like to work from home so you can be around to help them with anything they might need.
Ask if you can have a private meeting with them and explain the situation. During the meeting, be sure to discuss everything that you have on your list and raise any queries you might have.It’s also a good idea to ask for a copy of your company’s handbook and their employee leave policies if you don’t already have access to them. If any notes are made during the meeting, you can ask for a copy.
How to tell your HR team
Be clear
Provide details whenever possible, and ask for the reasonable accommodations you need. summarise agreements in an email after each conversation.
Review policies
Check your organisation’s policies that relate to leave, which may be available on the intranet.
Explain the challenges
Explain how your caring role affects your work, such as struggling with deadlines or needing to take time off without notice. You can also mention how difficult it is to balance work and caregiving, and what has helped or not.
While we have ensured that every article is medically reviewed and approved, information presented here is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have any questions or concerns, please talk to one of our healthcare professionals or your primary healthcare team.